success

Take the 30 day gratitude challenge

~ David C.
 
 
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

 

 
Life is a series of up and downs and if you are not currently fighting a storm I can assure you that one is on the way. It is easy while in the midst of a difficult time to forget all that we have in life to be thankful.
 
That is one reason that for many years now I have begun most days with a mindset of gratitude. Most mornings and especially on Mondays I make an effort to reflect on the many things I have to be thankful about in my life. How can I have a bad week when there is so much good around me?
 
I try to affirm daily the good in my life and begin my day with thanks for what I have now and the opportunity to have even more in the future. I do this with a prayer thanking God for the present blessings in my life and for the opportunity a new day represents. Doing so only takes a few minutes of quiet reflection.
 
Example: 
“Lord today I thank you for ____________ and pray you will lift this person up and bring joy to their day”

“I thank you today for my ________ help me to appreciate it and all the other good things I have in my life.”

“Thank you, Lord, for this new day and the new chance to be my best and to serve others. I will honor this blessing today through my actions, my attitude and my results” 
 
Having gratitude for others is important since we never win alone. Do I have bad days and times when I am grumpy? Absolutely! These are the days when taking a moment for reflection and appreciation mean the most.
 
The belief in a day of success with a reflective moment on something positive begins momentum the right direction. It is on the days when I do not do this that I tend to falter.
 
Prayer works for me and may work for you as well. At the very least as you begin your day start it by affirming something and someone positive.
 
Next state your absolute belief success will follow as you go through your day.
 
My challenge to you is the try this for a month and see what happens. When negativity creeps into your mind as your day progresses repeat your prayer from the morning and commit to reset your attitude. I know that no matter what storm you are in now or what storm is coming there are things in your life that you have at this moment that you can take 2 – 5 minutes each day to give thanks. Just the fact that you woke up to face another day is a blessing as opposed to the alternative.
 

Try giving thanks each morning for the next 30 days. You will be amazed at the difference it will make.

 

Chasing Success

~ David C.
Many years ago when I was a young man new in the corporate world met a fellow that was just about to retire. I remember he was super old like 55 or something (I am 50 now) and had a plan to hike the Appalachian trail. I do not recall his position with the company but I am sure it was not an executive level or anything like that. 

Learning that I was a new parent, he decided to give me some advice on how to have a happy career and retire early. He told me a story about a high school friend of his at a recent reunion that had given him a hard time about not having climbed higher on the corporate ladder. 

“I congratulated him on his career success and then asked him a few questions” 
“How many times have you been married?”

The answer was 2

“How many kids do you have?” 

The answer was 3 with two from the first marriage and 1 from the current

“Do you pay alimony and child support”

“Yes”

“Do you see your kids every day?” 

“No, my first wife has remarried and lives in a different city” 

“Are you going to be able to retire on your own terms and with money in the bank?” 

You can kind of see where the conversation was going. My new buddy told me that early in life he set his priority to be the best husband and best father that he could be. He on purpose then passed on job opportunities and promotions that would have taken him away from his primary mission.

 In the organization, he was at this time, not a CEO or anything like that but he was a high-level manager with a lot of responsibility. He was also very respected by his team and I could tell was a solid leader.

He had a career that was well done.

Along the way, he lived a conservative lifestyle, gave of his time freely to others, and invested heavily in his family. The bonus reward for all these choices was just around the corner as he was about to embark on a grand adventure to follow his dreams. The man just oozed joy and this 20-minute conversation really changed my perspective on life. 

Twenty years later I still remember that conversation and the impact it had on me. Looking back I am happy with the choices I have made along the way with my family, finances, and career. Yes, there have been many mistakes along the way but overall life is good. Looking forward, we are on our way to our next stages of dreams and that path I pray will be as full of joy as that I saw in the face of this man.

Life is going to be full of choices, I learned on that day to decide who I wanted to be and to not pay a price for success by losing things that were far more important and long-lasting.

Know your values. Know your goals and never waiver.

How to write goals for success

~ David C.
If you read my previous post you understand the importance of goal setting to reach success. You must also be committed to joining the 9% club by following through with what you want to achieve.

Everyone is different and how you organize your goals need to be your own but I thought I would share what has worked for me over the years.
A Key thing to know is that goal setting is not a one-time event. Goals are to be in progress at all times and there is nothing wrong at all with having things that will take years to accomplish. This is why having them in writing and updated regularly will help you.
If you need a model for structuring your goal there is always the classic SMART format.
Specific–What do you want?
Measurable–How will you know you have achieved it?
Attainable–Is this goal even possible?
Relevant–Will the goal make a positive difference for you and/or others?
Time–when will you start, what are milestones along the way and when will you finish? (this is important)
I go a little extra by adding an E and an R.
E–what about this goal excites me so much that I am willing to make sacrifices and overcome the obstacles that will come my way?
R–what is the reward?  When the goal is accomplished and just as importantly when the goal is in progress what is going to be the outcome benefit of having gone through all this effort.
Breaking your goals down into great detail takes a lot of time but the long-term benefit to going through this process will help you see things to the end.
I also break my goals up into specific categories to ensure I have a well-rounded focus for the year. These categories are:
Faith–how will I grow this year to be closer to God and to serve others?
Family–how will I grow as a husband and as a father?
Career–how will I demonstrate excellence in my work to better serve those around me?
Finances–how will we keep our life debt free while building a future for retirement?
Fitness/health–how will I stay fit and healthy?
Fun–What adventure will we have for the year?
I know this can sound like a lot and I guess it is. However, since I have been using these same categories for many years and since I review these often, really after the first time subsequent years become simply tweaks.
If all this seems overwhelming I suggest you start with just one category and then dig deep into your SMARTER plan to make things happen. Once you see the results of this effort you will get motivated to expand your planning to every area of your life. Soon as you start checking off milestones along your journey you will meet your three new best friends–Mo, Men and Tum.
When they join your team. Nothing will stop you!
So what are you waiting for?

Hello My Name Is…..

~ David C.
Hello my name is…..
Regret, stupid, mistake, loser, ugly, fat, defeat
For many people the labels we wear in our hearts about who or what we think we really are can be completely debilitating. Many are self-created for no real reason at all while others are the result of false assessments placed on us through the ignorance and meanness of others.
I am 46 yet in my head on bad day I can see very clearly the time as a second or third grader when in a moment of self defeat I etched “dummie” on  a brick outside the west side of our house. That moment and that word haunted me for years as not only did it continue to echo in my head but later I realized it would not come off the brick. I had created a false label. 
I think we all do this. We etch labels so deeply in our hearts that we just can’t seem to remove them. Then for some to feel better they transfer these labels to others in an effort to feel better.  I know way too many people that hate themselves and then in turn spend too much time pulling down the world around them.
I will be taller by making those around me smaller.
As Matthew West so successfully reminds us in his song we are not in many cases who we might think. Do not believe the lies. You (and I) have been placed on this world for a reason.
You can and will make a difference for your future. You can leave your past behind.
Hello
Person of influence
Successful employee
Go getter
Loving parent
Devoted spouse
Faithful servant of God

It is wonderful to meet you. 
What is your label?  

Get your but out of my way

~ David C.
Years ago I used to facilitate a course that had a section about attitude. I began the session with a little exercise with the folks in pairs to share a story. The conversation had to be about a plan for the future and for round one no matter what person #1 shared the second person was to respond “yes but!”

“I am really looking forward to the weekend with my family”

“Yes but it looks like it is going to rain all weekend so you will not be able to do much.”

“My son is doing great is school right now”

“Yes but you know college is going to be super expensive and most likely he will struggle to get a job when/if he graduates.”

The round two response had to be a positive “yes and”

“I am really looking forward to the weekend with my family”

“Yes and with the rain you could play some really fun board games with great conversations.”

“My son is doing great in school right now”

“Yes and that is a terrific indicator of a positive future ahead.”

You kind of get the idea huh? The point of the conversation was to help people identify if they are a “yes but” or a “yes and person”

Sadly yes buttends to be my nature with my internal voice. Thankfully in in part due to this exercise I am always striving for the yes and instead. It really is amazing the difference switching that word can make in your attitude, outlook and life.
Even more sadly is the number of yes but’ers I see around me all the time. These folks are joy killer constantly striving to have everyone sink to their low level of negativity.

I say…..Keep your but out of my way!

What about you? Are you a yes and or a yes but person? How to you keep negative people out of your life?

Don’t let a but get in your way.

The Pool

~ David C.

I recently visited my hometown for a reunion and had the opportunity to visit many of my favorite childhood hangouts. The pool in particular brought back some interesting memories.

I enjoyed the pool except for one object. The high dive. I will never forget that thing. It taunted me every time I went swimming. Down at the shallow end of the pool I would stand and stare at it with awe. It was as tall as any diving board ever erected. The sun gleamed off its light blue surface and somehow seemed to make those who successfully made the climb more beautiful than the rest of us mere mortals.

I could clearly see from my vantage point the excitement of the hero children who flew off the edge of the structure with all the glory of an eagle diving to the surface of some majestic mountain lake to capture its prize for the day. They seemed to live the life of excitement I craved.

Then finally one day I mustard up the courage to make the climb. I was careful not to tell any of my shallow pool friends that this was the time I had chosen to fly. As I stood there at the bottom rung of the ladder I thought how different my life was going to be after conquering the high dive. I would now be among the pool elite. No longer would I be constrained in the shallow depths of my inner fallacies.

So up I went. Step after step. Soon I had made it to the top and walked to the edge of the board. As I looked down, my enthusiasm waned. Now I could see all the way to the bottom of the pool. The dive that just minutes earlier had me nervous about the 15-foot drop suddenly looked more like a 1,000-foot spiral of death.

What to do?! I couldn’t just turn around. By now everyone in the pool was staring at the chubby diving board kid and knew I was nothing but a frightened little boy. Also there were other kids gathered at the bottom just waiting for me to do something. If I failed, everyone would know. I would become the subject of ridicule for all. Stories would be written. Songs would be sung. All would come to know the failure that was David Copeland.

So with all the courage I could muster I jumped.

It was one of the most spectacular belly flops ever performed.

So what happened next? Part of me would like to tell you that I climbed right up that ladder and gave it another try. To tell you the truth, I don’t think I ever jumped again. Within a few years they removed the high dive and took away any chance I would ever have to conquer the blue behemoth.

Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever worked hard to climb the ladder of success or get to the project assignment only to find the view from the top to be more frightening than you imagined?

I have many times and many of my attempts turned into flops. Fortunately, I have begun to learn that when I am faced with these situations I must to give it another try because sometimes it is better to face the pain head or belly on. Walking away only leaves us with feelings of regret. When we return to climb up the latter again, we may find the board to be gone, the project reassigned, or promotion no longer there.

I do not want to miss my opportunities to fly. I want to see the challenge and dive in headfirst. I want to live a life that soars beyond my earthly expectations.

What about you? Would you jump again?